A story based on true events during Christmas 2021 — Over the Christmas period, my husband, Mark, and I stayed with our daughter, Zoe, and her partner, Jack, in their Victorian terraced cottage in the UK. My Aunt Carrie used to live here and when she died, having not married and with no children of her own, she kindly left…

Finding a way through the dull days of a writing life — Being a freelance writer can be a lonely profession; we don’t have a team to carry us through the tough times, or the banter by the coffee machine, the Friday feeling of a weekend beginning, team meetings on a Monday morning, or encouragements to carry on writing and improve our…

A profound moment in the company of Alzheimer’s — Last week I went to see my dad for the first time in two years. Since I last saw him, he has been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s and has been in and out of the hospital with reoccurring heart issues, a health problem that has haunted him for the past 30…

The spoken but unnoticed challenges to our tender mental health conditions — When we speak about experiences of mental health issues, we often talk about how we “fight” with depression, or that we need to “beat” anxiety or panic attacks. We talk about how we must “struggle through”, or that we are “battling” with a borderline personality disorder. We listen to reports…

Not being able to urinate when needed can be physically harmful and psychologically stressful — You may ask what a bashful bladder is and how it can affect those experiencing it, and in fact, I had to look it up when a therapy client told me about the struggles he was experiencing. It was then I realised that this is one of those topics that…

How to manage the effects of personal change on your relationship — A couple of days ago I noticed an advert for a website, promoted with the slogan, “Therapy Damages Your Relationship.” After giving this rather strong statement some thought, I came to the conclusion that there might be some truth in this. As a relationship therapist, I see couples who experience…

Understanding why can bring clarity and make it easier to cope with — The end of therapy can produce emotions that in themselves are difficult to cope with. Losing the therapeutic relationship can evoke feelings similar to those we experience after a relationship break up. Our therapist is very aware of the emotions this ending can evoke and will be prepared to work…

Know the difference to get what you need — A question I have frequently been asked as a therapist is how therapy is different from talking with parents or a trusted friend. It’s a good question, after confiding in a good friend can give us ideas and we might hear how they see our situation. We could even see…

How to treat vaginal atrophy — There are many conditions that can cause vaginal pain during intercourse; one is vaginal atrophy. This condition often stops women from taking part in lovemaking, let alone enjoying it. The worry is that penetration will hurt them, and with that worry, their sex drive falls flat on the floor. Although…